“IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED”

A MULTI-ACT PLAY

Act X, Scene 1 – Barnes & Noble – the aisle bisecting “Science” and “New Age”

Enter: a couple, Jersey-accented. Retirement-aged and bundled-up

She: What are you looking for?

He: I’ll find it.

S: But what is it that you’re looking for?

H: Poltergeists.

S: A book on poltergeists?

H: Yeah.

S: All right.

H: It’s under “P.”

S: (a pause) No, it’s all here by author. You’re just going to have to look.

H: I’ll find it.

S: Maybe you should just ask.

H: No, I’ll find it.

(a longer pause as they both look)

S: I don’t think they have anything.

H: They got it.

S: How do you know? Where did you see this book?

H: I seen it in a movie.

S: What was the movie called?

H: “Poltergeist.”

S: (a pause) The movie was called “Poltergeist?”

H: Yeah.

S: (a pause) I mean, that was the name of the movie?

H: Yeah.

S: (a pause) Well, you’re looking in the supernatural section, you should be looking in movies.

H: It’ll be here.

S: It’s a fiction movie, you’re not gonna find it here.

H: Yes, I will.

S: No, you won’t.

H: Yes, I will.

S: No, you won’t.

H: Yes, I will.

S: Aagh. (waves hand, exits)

H: (a pause) Yes, I will.

END SCENE